Do Not Feed the Monkeys

Homo sapiens Unlock all the Trophies!

Pongo lostintranslansis They may communicate in a strange manner, but these apes can be very loving and passionate.

Callimico oviparus The only primates capable of laying eggs.

Papio stellaris Their natural habitats include outer space, dreams and rainy cities.

Galago cholesterolus Generous by nature, they don't let any member of their group go hungry.

Microcebus nudensis They look past appearances: these monkeys look for inner beauty.

Petterus supermegafan They are crazy about spotlights, flashes and teen-ape actresses.

Aotus chauffeurii They hate moving around the jungle on foot.

Prebytis freedonius They organize themselves around charismatic and slightly genocidal alpha males.

Mandrillus lupus They transform themselves, howl and change their fur with great ease.

Cebus smilenis These monkey put the happiness of their offspring before anything else.

Colobus corsarii They love sports and cleanliness. And, above all, they hate confined spaces.

Lepilemur poopoo The most creative and talented, although with a certain tendency towards scatology.

Allocebus darwiniana Monkeys with a passion for natural selection and the struggle between the species.

Lemur wylonii major Apes with unimpeachable morality. ABSOLUTELY unimpeachable.

Lemur wylonii medus Good, caring, empathetic... These primates are morally acceptable.

Lemur wylonii vulgaris Never trust them: they are the most immoral of all monkeys.

Gorilla clubensis minor Obedient and helpful primates.

Gorilla clubensis medus Very obedient and very helpful primates.

Gorilla clubensis major The most obedient and helpful monkeys: ALWAYS at the service of their keeper.

Macaco amateurensis They belong to the Club's second level: "Amateur Zoologist".

Macaco masteriensis They belong to the Club's third level: "Master in Primatology".

Macaco doctoriensis They have reached the Club's highest level: "The Cage of the Great Primate."

Aotus televisibus They go crazy over the most extreme emotions on the boob tube.

Propithecus molli Half ape, half mole: these primates cannot keep their mouths shut.

Hylobates silensis The most faithful, loyal and discreet primates.

Hapalemur dolarii They like money almost as much as piggybanks do.

Colobus express Now you see 'em, now you don't: these are the fastest monkeys in the jungle.

Tarsius amazonius Big fans of maxing out their credit cards without leaving the tree.

Ateles pencilianus Methodical and obsessive: they don't stop until their pencil is worn down to a stub.

Mandrillus barfii Their appetite knows no limits. It's a good idea to keep a mop near them.

Mandrillus collector minor Amateur collectors. They always hold on to something as a souvenir.

Mandrillus collector medus Experienced collectors. They have a hard time letting go of anything.

Mandrillus collector major Compulsive collectors. They hold on to everything, absolutely EVERYTHING.