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Olive Branch Return the stamp album to Weird Ed

Rap Sheet: Thief Pick up 15 things that don't belong to you

Fashion First Purchase $1000 in clothing (Campaign only).

Codex Discovered the meaning of the supernatural graffiti

So Close... The Old Warehouse - Reach the end with all characters... and fail

Drive By Stop an armored truck by taking out the driver.

Collector All Collected all of the artifacts

Moving On Collected every trophy in the game

No Stone Left Unturned Find all documents, relics and GPS caches.

Professional Fortune Hunter Find 40 Treasures

Brutal Slugger Kill 20 Enemies with Brutal Combo

Big Bang Defeat 20 enemies with explosives

And Then the Universe Explodes Try to mix the decaf and caffeinated coffees

Locked and Loaded Buy all attachments for one weapon (Campaign only).

Moronic Drone Get a job

Data Collector Scan all enemy types

Only Hoagie Can Make a Tree Create a cherry tree

Only George Can Destroy a Tree Destroy a cherry tree

Not So Fast Defeat 25 enemies while they are under the effect of Empowered Slow

Rap Sheet: Kleptomaniac Pick up 30 things that don't belong to you

Rap Sheet: Yegg Open the safe

Novelty Enthusiast Get all six novelty items

Voiding the Warranty Try to put something metal in the microwave

Obvious, Really... Make it rain

That Only Works with Alligators Try to flush the hamster

Windsock it to Me Change the flag

Tourist Win a bet on a cockfight.

Costume Quest Clothe Laverne in the costume

Rap Sheet: Vandal Deflate Oozo

WWSCD? Climb through the chimney with all three kids

That Joke Never Gets Old Squirt five different people with disappearing ink

Of Course It Would Still Weigh the Same Get a tiny sweater

Chateau Eau Neaux Make vinegar

Don't Try This at Home Microwave the frozen hamster

Oh Right, I'm Playing a Cartoon! Make a skunk

Missing Pink Try to mix the red paint and the Booboo-B-Gone

Far, Far Away... Drive a total of 50 km

You Call That a Hint? Try to wash the dirty car with the brush

It's an Honor Just to Compete Enter the human contest

Rap Sheet: Cheat Disqualify Harold

Coffee Achiever Wake up Dr. Fred

It's an Honor Just to Compete But Winning Is Better Win the human contest

Behind Every Great Man Is a Quality Roadie Red makes a super battery with only a little help from Hoagie

Rap Sheet: Adventure Gamer Pick up 45 things that don't belong to you

Number Two Power Laverne's Chron-o-John

You Suck Vacuum up a hamster

Dialog Puzzles Are Hard Get Fred to sign the contract

Flush Acquire a diamond

Number One Power Hoagie's Chron-o-John

Extra Crafty Craft 25 recipes (Campaign only).