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Welcome to the Family, Son Escape from the guest house.

Customizer Customize a weapon.

Defy Authority Defeat a Phylakes.

Dude, It's Like, Cannibalism Hoagie eats a Hoagie

And Then the Universe Implodes Try to mix the disappearing ink with Booboo-B-Gone

Only You Sucessfully complete the First Trial (Solo Campaign only).

Peachy Keen Bait Peaches into going back home (Solo Campaign only).

Saving Deputy Hudson Save Deputy Hudson (Solo Campaign only).

Olive Branch Return the stamp album to Weird Ed

Sewer Rat Destroy a cult water treatment pump and make them thirst for revenge (Solo Campaign only).

RUTHLESS The Tracis were killed

The Crocodile Complete Main Quest "The Crocodile's Jaws".

Burnt Toast Defeat Toasty without getting hit by him

Rap Sheet: Thief Pick up 15 things that don't belong to you

Fashion First Purchase $1000 in clothing (Campaign only).

I'm Sure He'd Never Notice Try to swap the textbook with the stamp album

So Close... The Old Warehouse - Reach the end with all characters... and fail

Slasher Kill 3 enemies with one hit.

THESE ARE OUR STORIES Spend 20,000 bonus points

Gladiator Play a game on Utopia Coliseum

The Siege Complete Main Quest "The Aftermath".

Hacked a Security Camera The player has successfully hacked a security camera

100 Headshots Kill 100 Enemies with Headshots

The Apprentice Complete chapter 4

50 Kills: M4 Kill 50 Enemies with the M4

Professional Fortune Hunter Find 40 Treasures

Blissful Save the Marshal from the Bliss (Solo Campaign only).

Brutal Slugger Kill 20 Enemies with Brutal Combo

Almost There Complete Main Quest "The Final Weighing".

Big Bang Defeat 20 enemies with explosives

The End Complete the last Main Quest.

And Then the Universe Explodes Try to mix the decaf and caffeinated coffees

Hitting Your Stride Upgrade any weapon to the next level

Locked and Loaded Buy all attachments for one weapon (Campaign only).

Moronic Drone Get a job

Quite the Collector Collect 150 Cards

Data Collector Scan all enemy types

Only George Can Destroy a Tree Destroy a cherry tree

Only Hoagie Can Make a Tree Create a cherry tree

"What I did back in the fat days is none of your business. You know the rules." Talk to Eva about how she got stuck here.

MORAL VICTORY Markus succeeded in making the soldiers stand back

Not So Fast Defeat 25 enemies while they are under the effect of Empowered Slow

Path to the Goddess Solve the Goddess Statue puzzle.

A Simple Plan Complete Memory Sequence 2.

What's in the Box? Unlock the strong chest in Doctor Shemp

Rap Sheet: Kleptomaniac Pick up 30 things that don't belong to you

Rap Sheet: Yegg Open the safe

Vermin Extermination Destroy a Mr. Raccoon.

I Remember! Gather all B-12 memories.

Novelty Enthusiast Get all six novelty items