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Speeding Slowly Win Class 3 Race at Stadium

Great Barnacled One It’s dark inside the whale, but the men appear to be intact.

No Man is a Canyon Use Items in No Man's Canyon

Testosterone Pass the Tests of Manhood

Sunken Ship Destroy Ship at Drill Platform

Clap Hands Get Seal Piece at Dig

Speed Quicker Win Class 2 Race at Stadium

What's That Smell? Escort Men Through Sewers

SELF-CONTROL Markus let Leo win

Doggin' the Hellcats Destroy 5 Hellcat Cruisers

Speed Speedily Win Class 1 Race in Stadium

Grin and Baron It Defeat Baron in Mar's Tomb

Pedal to the Metal Destroy Metal Kor at Nest

We're All Friends Here Rescue Friends at Fortress

Community Surprise Play a Top Rated map in the Map Browser (Map Browser only).

Bot Bot Boom Boom Protect Hideout from Bomb Bots

CONFESSION Connor made the android confess

Timber! Destroy Drill Platform Tower

Wooden Trousers “Aye, they’ll float,” nods Steady Beard.

…Bearded Travelers The absurdity of underwater speech only adds to the wonder apparent on his face.

I Heart Heart Get Heart of Mar in Weapons Lab

Heavy Distortion Attack the Metal Head Nest

Finders Keepers Find Sig in Underport

Who Knew Krew Blew? Beat Krew in Weapons Lab

Head Master Collect 510 Metal Head Skull Gems

BLOODHOUND Connor got the location of Jericho by himself

The Path of Waiting “Time flows quickly in contemplation of the Great One’s splendor.”

SCORCHED EARTH Markus or Connor detonated the freighter

Well Met… “Er, hullo,” stammers Brave Beard.

The Long Way “Really very sorry for scuttling your promotion and all that,” offers Steady Beard.

Fountain of the Faithless “Give me water, and I’ll teach it to carry me!”

QUITE GOOD AT FLOWERS “Quick, while we’ve a chance!” whispers Hasty Beard, leading the way to the boat.

Complimentary Trip to the Afterlife “Shouldn’t you be a bit more chipper, having won and all?” prods Steady Beard.

Out of the Deepening Darkness Collapsing, the maelstrom tosses the men in their barrels toward the surface.

THREE AT JERICHO Bring the three characters to Crossroads

Womenfolk in the Water Finding the dark water empty, the men quickly regret their course of action.

Vengeance Satisfied The creature drags the struggling men deeper beneath the waves, finally tossing them aside in disgust.

Rap Sheet: Trespasser Find Fred's basement workshop

The Collectivist Collect 125 Precursor Orbs

In Need of Assistance Heedless of the warning, the burly seals spread out as they swim, until the spell around them weakens and they become human once more.

Getting Your Beards Wet The orbs lead on, out through the cavern’s deep tunnels and beyond the island.

The Back Door Following the glow of moonlight, the men step out eagerly into the night.

Into the Deepening Darkness The men paddle furiously, but the widening vortex is inescapable.

QUITE GOOD AT THROWING “Great idea!” cuts in Steady Beard. “How about a demonstration?”

She's a Goner Clinging to wooden barrels, they watch their beloved ship sink into the depths.

Poor Beastie With a piercing screech, the creature disappears back into the depths.

A Bargain to Make “Right, then. Let’s be off!” commands Brave Beard, striking a leaderly pose.

Foiled by the Tree The jaws snap shut over the shattered tree, launching the men out into the deepening darkness.

Thus is Thy Fate Sealed With a rumble, the island sinks slowly into the sea, carrying all hands with it.

The Collectationator! Collect 286 Precursor Orbs