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Canute the Greater As an unreformed tribal, form the North Sea Empire.

The Maker Of Kings Collect all the trophies in the game

Apocalypse Can Wait In rogue-like mode, find out the truth and eliminate the threat Beneath the Stolen Lands.

IT'S ALL SHE TAUGHT ME nostalgia. bitters. demerara.

FREE AS IN WHATEVER THIS IS no point to the game. you just walk around, jumping

I BET YOU CAN'T GUESS WHAT MY FIRST NAME FOR THIS ACHIEVEMENT WAS okay fine. you got it first try. it WAS "posting through it."

Basque In My Glory Embrace the Basque paganism faith during the Iberian struggle.

Rich in Diversity As a character of a faith with Jizya or Tax Nonbelievers doctrines, have ten vassals of other faiths

SHE GETS DISTRACTED EASILY, DOESN'T SHE? honestly, if i'm playing a video game, and there's a minigame in the video game, i WILL spend all my time just doing that

IT'S RJ'S FAULT BARTENDING IS EVEN IN THE GAME "'you look a little bar tense' - andrew tsai" - rj lake

Vladimir's Second Choice As a North Germanic Asatruan, convert yourself and all of Russia to Islam.

Miklagarðaríki As an Asatru, hold the kingdom of Thessalonika with a title other than Byzantium.

A Thousand and One Night Orchestrate a Grand Wedding where the Spouses become Soulmates

DID YOU KNOW EVERY STAR YOU SEE IN THE NIGHT SKY IS BRIGHTER THAN OUR SUN You've hit a 5.0 STAR rating. That was the first thing that came up when I searched "cool facts about stars"

CRITICAL BASS THEORY YOU GET THIS FOR BEATING TEN SONGS WITH CRIT MODE ON. I'M SORRY FOR THE NAME OF THIS ACHIEVEMENT AND I'M SORRY FOR YELLING.

I'm sorry. I lied to you. UNBEATABLE is not the only rhythm game there are actually many rhythm games

please change your offset either something is very wrong or you are REALLY good at playing the game badly on purpose

King of all the Isles As a North Germanic Asatruan, control all Atlantic and Mediterranean islands.

Bod Chen Po As a member of the Pugyel Dynasty, re-create the Empire of Tibet.

Iberian Compromise End the Iberian struggle through compromise.

Iberian Conciliation End the Iberian struggle by setting your differences aside.

The Andalusian Inquisition Convert all of Iberia to the Mozarabic faith.

The Grandest Tour Visit ten Kingdom Tier Vassals on a Grand Tour

Imperial March As an Emperor, go on an Intimidation Tour visiting all of your Powerful Vassals

The Very Best Finish any track in the Hastiluder Trait

WE CAN PRETEND THAT JUST DIDN'T HAPPEN sewer? i hardly kn

ROPE BURN This is probably the scariest thing that happens in the game

Turkish Eagle As the Seljuk Count in Samosata, own Rum and a Hybrid culture of Oghuz and Greek.

Lingua Franca Have every Royal Court speak your Court Language.

Holidaying in Iberia Start as an uninvolved character, become involved and end the Iberian struggle.

The Iron and Golden King Have a capital Barony with 60+ income, a stationed 500+ Heavy Cavalry Regiment and a mine

Legendary! Complete a Legend

I KNOW WHAT KIND OF PERSON YOU ARE okay at some point patience has to stop being a virtue

A GAME WHERE MUSIC IS ILLEGAL AND YOU FOLLOW THE LAW Rhythm is life. It's inherent to being human. That's why playing this minigame feels like eating razors

THE STUFF HAVER look. i have to ship these achievement names and descriptions right now. YOU try coming up with these

:( this is for breaking a lot of 100+ combo chains. don't feel too bad. it'll happen to everyone who plays the game enough

ONE MORE BEGINNING lost family found

[white label] remarked

DEAD BALL Survived a ghost encounter. I'm so, so sorry if you already did this in the demo.

Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My! Capture a large wild animal while on a Hunt

Little William Marshal Win every Contest at a Grand Tournament with at least three Contests

You'll Never Take Me Alive! Travel to a safe holding while your Capital is infected by a Epidemic

Pay Respects Host a Funeral for your Legend Protagonist

Epic Paperwork Adopt the Administrative Government via Decision

I HONESTLY DON'T REALLY HAVE ANYTHING ELSE TO SAY ABOUT STARS You've hit a 10.0 STAR rating. I'm done talking about stars now

ONE VERY FULL COMBO technically if it was one big full combo that'd mean full comboing all the songs with no breaks. we're not making you do that

ALL CAPS OR NO CAPS until next time.

Royal Flush As a character of a faith with the Fadaeyeen Doctrine, dispose of a Lowborn, a King and an Emperor

The Pharaoh Islands As a Scottish character, complete a Legend claiming your descent from Ancient Egypt

Band of Brothers Have every camp followers temperament be positive and have at least 10 camp followers